A Quorum of Andrews

•January 22, 2020 • Leave a Comment

“How many is a quorum? Four, right?”

“Depends on the size of the group. A majority, maybe? Why?”

“We were trying to decide if we had a quorum of Andrews.”

This was an Andrew speaking- one of three in the office. He and another Andrew had been carrying on a discussion and the conversation had raised the question whether they needed the third Andrew in order to make a decision.

“I think it’s just enough for a group to be able to vote.” Someone offered.

Andrew looked up the definition of quorum on Wikipedia: a tangle of jargon as clear as blue mud. It boiled down to: “whatever the group decides counts.”

A lively discussion of parliamentary procedure ensued. Who was the chair-Andrew? Was the unity of Andrews equal or did the chair-Andrew yield more power? What kind of government structure were they anyway? Andrew posited that they were an oligarchy: a select ruling elite. After all, one had to be born an Andrew. Maybe that meant Aristocracy? No one was quite sure.

There was some further debate about whether “Andys” and “Drews” were part of the Nation of Andrews. They decided they were just Andrew adjacent: Commonwealth nations, perhaps. Or a United Kingdom of Andrews. But the Andrews themselves, they decided, were equals: not an oligarchy, then, but the purest form of democracy.

I probably used more of my knowledge of Social Studies in this single conversation than in the entire rest of my adult life.

There was then some discussion about whether The Andrews wielded the most power or whether they were matched by the Chris’s. No Chris was available to comment, and a Chris had recently left the cohort for another project. Did Christophe count or only Christopher?

It was decided that the nation of Chris was in recession. This prompted Andrew to look up names by popularity. The Andrews won for names within the office, although they recognized they would be outmatched by the Nation of John: the equivalent of China (in terms of proportional mass judged by landmass, not population), they decided. Or Russia.

Gwydhar, it was decided, was Luxembourg. Or the Vatican: a nation for the benefit of one person.

We are all extraordinarily responsible and mature adults here.

New Food

•January 21, 2020 • Leave a Comment

Ok, I’ve finally come up with a couple resolutions for the year:

  1. Avoid eating at chain restaurants.
  2. Finish something every month.

So far, that’s it, and I feel petty good about it. I mean, I’m having more success with Resolution #1 than with Resolution #2, but the month isn’t over yet.

I’m actually really enjoying the directive of avoiding chain restaurants: it has given me just enough of an excuse to try new places that we’ve already gotten to explore a few new spots that we never would have tried before. Last week we stopped at a bar called The Butcher’s Dog, which was excellent. This week we hit up a Mexican food place called Don Antonio’s that I never would have gone into otherwise, and it turned out to be great. I got to try Queso Fundito, which, as it turns out, is a straight-up bowl of melted cheese served with tortillas like a kind of DIY quesadilla. A truly pro level of cheese. Food of the gods. Would recommend.

So, anyway: off to a good start. I’m making an effort to avoid judging 2020 based on how January goes, but on the other hand if the rest of the year wants to follow January’s example… Well, I wouldn’t complain too loudly.

So Close

•January 16, 2020 • Leave a Comment

So Close.” Read the scrap of paper on the sidewalk. To what? It didn’t say. Somehow, I still felt reassured. I was close to something. So close.

It sometimes feels like the world spells out messages to me: as if we are carrying on a conversation of happenstance and intention. It feels like a language I’ve only just begun to understand.

Daily Gratitude

•January 14, 2020 • Leave a Comment

I’m grateful that my mother taught me how to make chicken soup out of chicken bones so that on nights like tonight I could come home after a long day to a mug of homemade chicken alphabet soup before bed.

Wine Musing

•January 10, 2020 • Leave a Comment

Does alcohol make a person More, or Less? Am I diminished or amplified? I am less inhibited, but more myself. Less thoughtful but more amiable. More free, but less careful. Happier, and more foolish.

Isn’t this happier, freer, less self-conscious self the person that I aspire to be more like? And how can I find this better self within myself and not from within a bottle?

Daily Gratitude

•January 10, 2020 • Leave a Comment

It’s cold enough to see my breath this morning, which in southern California constitutes omigodfreezing. I’m lucky enough to only have to withstand it for a little while: on my commute from home to work and back. And I have my pick of clothes to wear to keep me warm: even if most of my clothes are soft and impractical. I’m lucky enough to get to enjoy a little impracticality.

Daily Gratitude

•January 9, 2020 • Leave a Comment

The cat rides on my shoulders in the morning as I prepare lunches, purring against my neck. She sits on my lap when I watch TV, and misses me when I’m not at home. How did I get so lucky to get to live with such a pure love?

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