We’re All Introverts Here


What do you call a group of Introverts? Solitude.

What do you call a group of Introverts? Solitude.

I know I wrote about Introversion just the other day in my post The Social Introvert but I saw this helpful little comic and it was too good not to share: http://lolsnaps.com/news/46916/0/. Basic care and feeding of your neighborhood Introvert.

This actually gives me the perfect excuse to write about some derivative thoughts I had because of The Social Introvert. For example, it occurred to me that everyone assumes Introverts are a recognizable minority in the population. I’ve seen the number “one-in-four” people are Introverts, but no one really knows what the ratio is because some Introverts are very good at coping in social situations.

I can’t always tell which of my friends are Introverts. Introverts don’t have Gaydar for other Introverts.

Often Introverts and Extraverts can get along in glorious friendship. I love Extraverted friends: they can carry the conversation and I can happily participate by listening. They feel good because they are getting attention. I feel good because I’m being included. Peace, Love, and Happiness abounds.

The only time it becomes awkward is when the Introvert runs out of things to say.  Silences happen. It feels awkward.

Extraverts recognize this right away: this is when Introverts make them nervous.

Ironically, Introverts make other Introverts nervous too. Silence may not be bothersome to an Introvert but there is a silent dilemma of whether or not to be the one to fill the silence just in case  the other person is an Extravert and feels nervous. This then uses up more energy which makes more silences and makes more awkwardness.

The point I’m working around to is that when Extraverts need support they naturally seek out other Extraverts. It doesn’t come naturally to an Introvert to seek out other Introverts. I wonder whether the assumption that Introverts are out numbered by Extraverts three to one is skewed by this fact: if you only know people in social situations it’s easy to assume that everyone around you is an Extravert.

So my question is this to all my fellow Introverts: wouldn’t it be beneficial to be social with other Introverts? What sort of structure would an Introvert group take on? I assume it would be a bit like Quaker Meeting where everyone is companionably quiet until someone has something to say.

What are your thoughts? It’s OK- we’re all Introverts here.

(Silence is good too.)

~ by Gwydhar Gebien on February 8, 2013.

2 Responses to “We’re All Introverts Here”

  1. I like to think of introverts as people with headphones on. They go quiet because they’re listening to their own thoughts, chewing things over. But this is easy to forget in the anxiety laden ‘awkward pause’ you mention and usually whoever is the less introverted of the two ends up trying to fill that silence, even if both participants are super introverted to begin with.

    • The earphones analogy is a good one: I suspect Danellyn can relate to this. For example the times when we will quietly be driving along in the car and I’ll suddenly turn to him and as: “When humans live on the moon, what holidays do you think we will still celebrate?” That internal soundtrack can be pretty compelling sometimes.

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