Drawing on the Mind

Swashbuckling artwork, chaotic mindspace

Swashbuckling artwork, chaotic mindspace

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I finished another book today.

Progress towards getting back into step with my so-called normal routine has been slow, but I’m making progress. I marvel at the people who can snap right back into a routine after traveling because I always find myself struggling to get back up to speed. Partly I presume this is because I simply need time to recover from the strenuousness of the travel itself and partly I think it has to do with the fact that my normal routine runs along at a pretty good clip.

So finishing a library book feels like progress even if it wasn’t strictly productive towards any of the other projects that I’m trying to juggle.

The past weekend was dedicated to the SOE Live convention in Las Vegas, an annual convention for the players of online games such as Everquest, DC Universe, and other Sony products to mingle and learn what is in store for their game of choice. I attended as a vendor selling custom renderings of players’ in-game avatars: a service that has become quite popular in the past few years so that the SOE Live event has become a major event on my summer calendar. I’m relieved that the event itself is over and that it was a success, business wise, but success is a double edged sword in this case because it means that I now have a stack of orders which I still need to fill before I can truly move on to the next task.

So yesterday and today were dedicated to spending some quality time at the drawing board and putting pen to paper. I’ve gotten out of the habit of drawing for such long stretches at a time. I regret this a little bit: drawing is very relaxing to me (except when I’m under a deadline and under the weather). It has been nice to have the excuse to focus on it for a while. The only down side is that it gives me ample time to think- and dwell- on stressful things that still need my attention. It is a tricky mind-state to navigate: to let my mind wander over into a creative mind-space and yet not wander into an area where I might get distracted. It is a different kind of no-mind state from running or physical activity: instead of being able to put stressful thoughts out of my mind in order to draw it  sometimes feels like I have to think my way through all the things that are bothering me before I can really draw freely. Maybe this is why I occasionally avoid drawing even though it is an activity that I enjoy: because it requires so much time for rumination when I am really trying to compartmentalize things that are stressing me out.

So I have been doing a great deal of thinking lately (and, to be honest, a great deal of stressing as well) but I think that it is probably good for me to really sift through all my thoughts before classes begin next week. Forcing myself to take a look at all the things that have been swept to the corners of my mind at least lets me see what needs to be dealt with and what can be eliminated all together.

But that is a task for another day.

~ by Gwydhar Gebien on August 19, 2014.

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