Are you following me?

Are you following me?

Outside-Looking-In is a small black cat that lives in the parking lot behind my apartment building. I don’t see him very often. Once I encountered him on the stairs as I was going out the door, at which point I had to turn around and check back inside to make sure that Tober, the large black cat that lives inside, hadn’t gotten out. Another time I encountered Outside-Looking-In huddled against the pavement after a gentle rain. I made kissing noises at him trying to encourage him to approach, but he ran away. This morning I encountered him when I heard a hiss from the bedroom at Tober lept down from his perch at the window. Looking out I could see Outside-Looking-In standing on his hind legs trying to look in the window and falling short.

Outside-Looking-In seemed like an appropriate name.

I had a class earlier in the week that discussed the new outlets available for digital media: content for YouTube and Vine and SnapChat and so on. Internet superstars with millions of followers can pretty much write their own ticket. Having an audience is like being beautiful: it opens a lot of doors for you whether or not you have anything worth saying.

I found the discussion discouraging. Internet popularity is an elusive gift and I certainly don’t have it. I’m very happy for the few followers that I do have, but no one is going to clamor to sign me to a million dollar deal any time soon, alas. Outside-Looking-In: not just for small, black, cats.

The spark between an artist (of any kind, not just film) and audience seems to happen through some kind of strange alchemy. I wish that I could discover how it is accomplished. I console myself with the thought that I’m focusing more on content than on viewership, but to what end if I don’t have anybody to watch it?  Am I really making content worthy of viewership? Some days it feels like enough of an accomplishment just to write anything at all, but if I’m being really honest with myself my writing isn’t exactly highly crafted or deeply thoughtful material. I don’t write about any one thing in particular. I don’t usually express very extreme opinions. It might be time for me to up my game.

That said, I don’t know yet what changes I want to make or what improvements I want to attempt, but I think it is time to give it some thought.


~ by Gwydhar Gebien on February 20, 2015.

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