All I had was a bowl of cereal!

All I had was a bowl of cereal!

My apartment is infested with dirty dishes.

They seem to bubble up from the drains of the kitchen sinks until they fill both basins and spill over onto the counters and stove top. If I neglect to wash even one they get about the business of reproducing until they’ve built a little dish-dynasty. For half an hour after my morning run I stood in the kitchen washing everything down to the counter tops. By the time I left the apartment an hour later, a saucepan and a cereal bowl were already getting in a family way, ifyouknowhatImean.

At least I made an effort.

At least I got out for a run. My schedule suddenly picked up this week and I hadn’t gotten out for any exercise since Sunday evening. I don’t want to admit how much it was affecting me, but… well, it was. Thankfully, the driving need to go running every single day in order to avoid feelings of chest clenching anxiety seem to have past. Instead, I find myself beset by uneven bouts of low mood and apathy: the problem is that I usually wake up feeling pretty good, so the incentive to get right out the door for a run isn’t quite as immediate as it used to be and that makes it easy to put it off.

At least I’ve stopped dreaming about production every night. I still have an occasional dream call-time, but they are becoming the exception instead of the rule. The dreams aren’t much more rational now, though. In my dream from last night I was in a run-down hotel in New York where the door had to be locked from the inside with a key and if I forgot then they could get in. I wasn’t sure who they were but I was quite sure that they were after me and they wanted to get in. I had a note that I’d written on a slip of paper that they were after and I recall shredding it into tiny pieces so that I could keep them from reading it. The cat was there with me. He seemed to be my only actual company. It was a vivid dream at the time and I wish that I’d written it down earlier because I’ve forgotten most of it now.

At any rate, that’s how my day got started.

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~ by Gwydhar Gebien on September 17, 2015.

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