Recall


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Another letter from Honda

Getting a recall notice from Honda is like getting an acceptance letter from Hogwarts. The first time you get it, it is eye-catching and novel. You think: “Oh, I should go to there.” Then you try and some grumpy uncle makes it ridiculously difficult to do just that, which leads to a storm of letters flooding the mailbox until someone bigger and wiser, with a deep booming voice, steps in and sets things straight.

The first recall notice arrived in April. I didn’t get around to responding until May and I was told that the next earliest appointment was November. I opted to not make an appointment. Even if I made the appointment, I was going to be driving around for six months with faulty airbags that *might* blast metal shrapnel through my sinus cavity in the event of an accident: there didn’t seem to be any point in worrying about putting it on the schedule.

I like Honda, but it would’ve been nice to feel like they had a little hustle.

In their defense, Honda was replacing the airbags on every single model of their vehicles, for several model-years running and the task was enormous. And what the Honda dealerships may have lacked in urgency they made up for in persistence. Recall notices continued to arrive in the mail monthly. I dutifully filed them in the circular filing cabinet- at least through November. There didn’t seem to be much point in paying attention to them until then. By December, the urgency began to kick in and the notices began to pile up bi-weekly, using bigger fonts and brighter colors until they positively screamed: PLEASE, PLEASE CALL US, WE BEG YOU!

At last I called.

The first time that I tried to set up an appointment, I called the dealer directly, which may have been my first mistake. The second time I called, I called the appointment hotline on the Honda mailer which directed me to a lovely fellow named John who really ought to have been working in public radio. John asked why I hadn’t set up the appointment and I explained about the wait. John understood- evidently I wasn’t the only one: the question was multiple-choice and “The waitlist was too long” was the first answer.

John connected me to the dealership- who miraculously had an opening available for me the very next day.

Today.

So I took the van in today. I’m no longer at risk for shrapnel death- at least, I’m no longer in a position to  blame it on a known issue with a faulty airbag and sue if it happens. Although, being dead, I wouldn’t be in a position to do much of anything except haunt Honda from beyond the grave. Which I would do by making funny noises in peoples’ cars the minute they drive off the lot and keeping perfectly silent whenever the tech tries to listen for it.

Actually this explains a lot…

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~ by Gwydhar Gebien on January 20, 2016.

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