Ups And Downs


In the span of about half an hour I heard back about a job that I’d interviewed for two weeks ago (I didn’t get it) and a house that we had applied to rent (we didn’t get it). So the afternoon consisted of a one-two double shot of rejection right around four in the afternoon. I spent a little bit of time feeling sorry for myself, but mostly kept it to myself. The verdicts were not a surprise: enough time had gone by between the time when the opportunity came up and the time that the decision came down that I’d pretty much begun to assume that the answer was no, but I was still sorry to have that assumption confirmed.

So we’re back to square one again. Clearly it wasn’t meant to happen this month.

But I’m working at the moment, if only temporarily, and that is progress. Work attracts work. New opportunities are already beginning to emerge. And I’m keeping myself busy with the writing. When people ask me: “So what are you doing now that you’ve graduated” I’ve started replying with: “I’m working on some writing” instead of “I’m looking for work.” I think it has already made a difference.

Day two as a receptionist was much less intimidating than Day one. I’m beginning to get the handle on the phone system and even graduated to printing out mailing-labels. It’s a fast-paced life I lead. I joke, but this kind of thing is my comfort zone: sorting and organizing and printing and general mail-prep are all tasks that I enjoy. Tedious, yes, but not difficult, and typically finite. Organize this stack of documents. Type up that list of addresses. Prep this many envelopes. Objective tasks that can be completed. I like that.

Subjective tasks are the ones that I have to devote a lot of effort to: carrying on a conversation over the phone, negotiating, writing. With all the writing that I’ve been doing lately, I’ve begun to realize the sheer volume of text that is required for telling a story. Ideas need to be carefully spun out across a structure and need to go somewhere and are going to require a certain amount of time to get there: I think this is what trips up a lot of people when they think about writing- that with enough inspiration that the story will take no time to write. In truth, even at my most inspired, writing at my fastest possible rate (by hand or typing- difficult to say which is faster) I can only put down so many words in a day. I physically am not nimble enough to write a thousand pages in a day, even if I knew exactly where the story was going to go from beginning to end.

So that was an interesting insight.

I got quite a bit of writing done again- not quite as much as yesterday, but admittedly I was slowed down by the fact that I ran two pens out of ink. Which reminds me- I’ll need to see if I have more pens to bring with me tomorrow. If I am able to do any writing at all, tomorrow will make a full week of the Treating-Writing-Like-A-Real-Job experiment. I’ll be interested to see how it plays out.

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~ by Gwydhar Gebien on July 28, 2016.

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