Bug House


Not gonna lie- I feel like this every time I find one.

Not gonna lie- I feel like this every time I find one.

The new house and I are playing a game. It’s called “Where Will the Dead Roach Be This Time?” Yesterday it was in one of the bedroom closets: a big one the size of my thumb lying on its back in the middle of the carpet. Today it was gone- I don’t know how, but I’m secretly terrified that it was only playing dead and it actually got up in the middle of the night, chuckling to itself about the stupid human. Today it was replaced by an equally big roach in the middle of the living room floor- also on its back. I made a point of sweeping this one out onto the patio and crushing it with the foot of a patio chair- just to be safe.  There was a second, smaller roach carcass in my cleaning bucket (I threw it out in the garden) and a third one in the bathroom cupboard (flushed).

The good news is that they’re all dead. The exterminator came and sprayed and it seems to be working, but the constant discovery of dead roaches makes the house feel slightly booby trapped. I made a point of putting anti-bug paper in the cabinets under all the sinks and I’ve scrubbed all the cupboards and shelves clean. With luck, this will make for a very unappealing environment for insects to want to try to inhabit. Aside from the carcasses, the house is getting to be very clean.

I finally feel ready to begin moving things into the house. I’ve been bringing loads of belongings up all week and storing them in the garage workshop while giving everything a deep cleaning. It has been a frustratingly slow process, but it feels important to do it. It feels like a ritual act- a laying-on of hands into every corner and every surface to declare the space my own and forcing out any bad spirits. Bad spirits or not, I certainly feel more at home now that I know that everything is clean.

By contrast, the “home” where we’re still living is a mess. After spending all day cleaning the new place I don’t exactly feel like coming home to clean the apartment and it desperately needs it. Not only that, but every corner is cluttered with boxes and half packed possessions that need sorting and boxing before they will be ready to go up. So my brain feels cluttered no matter where I am, and it is exhausting. I always underestimate the emotional fatigue of trying to move.

Tomorrow my plan is to stay in the apartment and catch up on some of the packing that still needs to be done. Maybe some laundry. Maybe some cleaning. Drat- left all the cleaning supplies at the new place. Well, some organizing anyway. With luck, this will mean that I can go into the weekend with plenty of things ready to move straight into the house. With luck, this will help me clear my mind.

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~ by Gwydhar Gebien on August 18, 2016.

2 Responses to “Bug House”

  1. You are so your mother’s daughter!

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