Passes


Someday I want to be this guy.

Someday I want to be this guy.

I gotta figure out a faster way over the hills.

The past three morning commutes have had one thing in common: avoiding the 405. The only problem with this, is that the only other way to get across the hills from The Valley to The City is by taking winding, anxiety inducing neighborhood streets along with dozens of other intrepid morning commuters also trying to avoid the 405. Over the past three commutes I’ve taken three different routes through the hills, each as frustrating as the last. I want to trust Google, but I really wonder if it is worth it.

I wish that I knew when I turned into such a wimp about things. I get nervous when I drive on twisty roads. I get nervous before a perfectly good day at work. I get nervous, get nervous, get nervous. Will the parking garage have enough spaces? What if I’m not early enough (never mind “on time”, I found myself worrying whether I’d have thirty minutes of grace time). What if everybody is grumpy from being up too late at the Emmys? What if everybody is really busy because of the Emmys?

I know the fears are irrational, but no amount of rationalizing seems to help. I still find myself bound up with emotions that I can’t quite explain or control. Maybe it is because I’m trying so hard to prove myself that the stakes feel very high, even for minor things.

At any rate, in spite of my worries, it was a good day. Everybody was flying high from the Emmy’s and I spent a large portion of the day staring at three Emmy statuettes lined up at eye level on the receptionist desk. It made for a nice view for a Monday. Someday, I gotta get me one of those. The day went smoothly: just busy enough to keep me hopping, but not so busy that I was overwhelmed. Tomorrow is my last scheduled day for this gig: I’ll be sorry when the job is over: it seems like a good bunch of people. I hope to get to work with them again in the future.

 

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~ by Gwydhar Gebien on September 19, 2016.

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