Journey Of The First Step

Well, the good news is; I’ve taken the first step.

Yesterday morning I successfully sat down and began work on a new screenplay project. Strictly speaking, ‘new’ in this context means ‘new-to-me’ since this script is actually a collaboration with another writer who has already written a solid first pass. So, even though I’m starting from page one I don’t actually have to build this story out of whole cloth. You would think that knowing this would take some of the pressure off, but it turns out that my procrastination reflex is just as strong when it comes to re-writes as it is towards Original Works, and even though I intended to start work on Friday I found myself napping instead.

But yesterday, I successfully sat down and put words on paper for forty minutes.


The journey of the first step was complete. One step down, one-thousand miles to go.

The bad news is that my morning “writing hour” is now getting siphoned off into this new screenplay instead of going towards writing posts. Which is fine: really the screenwriting is a bigger priority, although I was hoping to get back into the habit of posting regularly again since I seemed to once again have time on my side. What I don’t seem to have much of, this week, is energy.

Partly, I’m sure, this is just the mental fatigue of living in These Times. My personal stress level continues to be at an apparent all-time low, but I do find myself snacking and napping a lot more often than I normally would; which is probably a physiological manifestation of stress that is too low-level to register as actual worry. My body’s way of saying “Maybe let’s rest up and, you know, store up a little extra padding… you know just in case.”

And partly I’m guessing this low energy has to do with the changing seasons and the changing weather, which; here in Southern California, has been unusually rainy. And probably changing hormones and changing routines. There’s a few variables in flux. And it might just be that I used up too much energy over the weekend digging up the backyard in order to plant my tomatoes. Turns out that I’m not used to bending and reaching and lifting and crouching for hours on end. Go figure.

So, I’m actually making a lot of good progress these days: the garden is planted, a new writing project is launched, I went running three days in a row, the house is (mostly) in some kind of order, and I’m still gainfully employed and, recognizing this as a privilege, I’m trying to remain diligent about staying attentive to production needs during Business Hours. But admittedly, yesterday, I was a bit useless. The day got off to a good start, but the longer it went on the more worn out I got. I had to lie down to rest three times throughout the day and finally just gave up on the notion of getting out for a run. Today, so far, has been better, but I’m definitely going to need to work on pacing myself.

~ by Gwydhar Gebien on March 31, 2020.

2 Responses to “Journey Of The First Step”

  1. You would benefit from brain foods. Try raw walnuts, almonds, mangoes, blueberries…for starters. Give that brain a jolt, along with your jaws, and you should find more energy you didn’t think you had.

  2. If you experience any joint pains, try some gummy/juju candy.

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